Tuesday, July 12, 2011


I didn't want to write here until I had something concrete to share.  Actually, I didn't really want to write here unless it was good news.  Hence the silence for a few days.  But sometimes no news is good news. 

I sent the transporter an email yesterday (Monday), asking him to confirm Little Love's arrival on Wednesday.  So far he has managed to ignore my phone calls and text messages but he has always responded to my emails.  But this time he didn't respond.   So I called and left a message.  Twice.  No response.   

I tried to believe that this meant that he was indeed still planning to deliver Little Love at the new barn tomorrow.  Because thinking the unthinkable was not an option.  So, I got into my car and drove three hours from our summer cottage to Helsinki, to be ready for her arrival.  By the time I got to my parents house in Helsinki and checked my email - yet again - the pit in my stomach was the size of a soccer ball.  Why was the transporter not responding back to me?  Last time he went MIA on me, he was on a vacation and left my horse sitting in Germany for a week.  It was starting to look a lot like déjà vu.

But then, at almost 9 pm, when I was in the shower (instead of staring at my phone and willing it to ring), he called. 

"I'll be dropping your horse off tomorrow around 1 pm."

Seriously, I thought I was going to cry.  We left Switzerland almost two weeks ago and finally tomorrow Little Love's journey across Europe would be over.  I am carefully hopeful, but the skeptic in me is saying I shouldn't believe it until I see it.  But how can I not be excited??  I will see her again tomorrow! What will she be like? Dissociated?  Scared? Skinny?  Will her feet look awful? (they didn't look too great nine days ago when I last saw her)  Or will she be alright; present in the moment and calm in the mind?  Perhaps she gained some weight resting in Germany?  She will come out of the car all shiny and healthy...

How am I going to sleep tonight? :-)


  1. You'd better post and let us all know how she is! I'm so glad that you will see her soon...for both your sakes!

  2. Hang in there!
    I's almost over and yes Little Love will be there with you tomorro - I am going to think positive for both of us! :-)
    I don't think she will be disassociated - I think she will be happy and overjoyed to see you...I really do :)
    I do think there's a slight possibility that she may be a bit thinner and her feet certainly won't have improved since you saw her last, but those things aren't a surprise when you consider the distance she has travelled and having been in strange barns - that kind of stress is normal. The good news is that these are things that will correct themselves as she adjusts to her new barn ( and having you there will make it all o.k).
    I have been thinking about you both since your last post and I hope you will write when Lilo has come home :) still....if you'd rather spend that time with her I think everyone who reads your blog will relate & understand :)
    As for tonight....try to have faith that it WILL work out fine, do your best to relax, and have a soothing cup of tea before bed (assuming you like tea)...Tomorro (and Little Love) will be here before you know it!

  3. Jesus H. Christ... I was hoping "no news" was good news, and it sure sounds like this nightmare is over tomorrow! I agree with Carol, Little Love will be ok, she knows you two will be together ( half the known universe has been pulling for you two!! :) ) and soon. I'm with you, K... it's the absolute unknown that drives you crazy with the "what if"s... Please write to all of us as soon as you can catch your breath, we want you to be with Lilo as much as possible. Blessings to you to have a restful sleep tonight, that tea sounds like it might be in order... or maybe a brandy...

  4. Yikes. The suspense is killing me.